Flat hunting with scammers

Thursday, August 13th, 2009

Q. How much fun can you have flat hunting?

A. It depends on how many people try to scam you, how bad they are at it and how long you’re willing to string them along.

Let me introduce you to Emilly aka Sylvia aka Emma aka….

I picked this lovely lady up on a popular flat-hunting website where she was advertising a single-bedroom flat in Mayfair for £500 per month, all bills included. She may as well have been offering me a villa on the Queen’s lawn with a stables in which to house my unicorns. Mayfair still won’t be that cheap when the Thames overflows and it’s six feet under water. In fact, the landlord will probably charge you extra for your scuba gear.

It was clearly a scam, but I was interested in how it panned out. After all, I understood how the Nigerian princes and beautiful women with kind hearts looking for life partners made money. How the hell does a flat scam run? A little something like this:

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Obliterating an eBook reader in one easy holiday

Wednesday, August 12th, 2009

Back in May I wrote a blog post outlining my plans to live with an eBook reader for a month as I ploughed through a digital copy of War and Peace. My aim, as I wrote at the time, was to put the eBook reader “through the wringer… It’s going to be flung in my bag, dropped in my pocket and keeping me company on the bus.”

As it turns out, eBook readers aren’t big fans of wringers, bags, pockets or buses.

Before I delve into my tale, I’d like to preface it with a couple of caveats. The first is that the eBook reader I chose was a production sample of a Cool-er. This means that my experiences were fairly specific to the device I was using. The second caveat has to do with the testing grounds. I took it backpacking with me around Cuba, which is hardly common usage. Given that I barely survived the trip – think caves, climbs, storms, humidity and blood – I’m not particularly surprised the Cool-er didn’t. Erm… I’ve rather given away the ending there.

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Why Chrome’s more fun without the polish

Thursday, August 6th, 2009

I’ve been messing around with the developer build of Chrome just recently and it’s made my browsing life considerably more interesting – much in the way that bowling hand grenades would really spice up a Test Match.

For anybody unaware of Google’s peculiar approach to Chrome’s development it runs like this: a wild-eyed Chrome developer wakes up at 2am with an idea so cool that in Microsoft’s secret underground lair Steve Ballmer orders half-a-dozen cats to kick out of windows. He doesn’t know why, he’d just knows he’s angry and some kittens will have to pay.

Unfortunately, this idea is also so cool that it could conceivably bring about internet Armageddon. The solution: instead of inflicting the idea on the fifteen or twenty people using the stable Chrome release, our bedraggled Chrome developer sticks it into the developer build where it can wreak havoc without anybody getting hurt. He then pokes and prods the idea until it settles down, accepts its fate in Chrome’s brave new browser world and complies, or else he destroys it with his code voodoo. This is the world of Google; stern but benevolent – to borrow a line from Pinky and Brain.

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Silverlight not so Flash for Microsoft

Thursday, July 30th, 2009

When Microsoft announced it was launching an iPlayer rival I could barely hear the words over the onrushing sound of catastrophic failure. If you listen closely, you can hear it too…. Huuuluuu, Huuuluuu, Hulu.

Having used Hulu, I can testify that it’s brilliant and now its flame-filled eyes of domination are on the UK. If the whispers are true it’ll stride into the UK next month, laughing maniacally and kicking its competitors in the crotch, I’d imagine. It’s going to be a bloodbath and if I were Microsoft I’d take Windows 7 and Office 2010 and hunker down in my fortress made of £100 notes. Instead it’s tying itself to the tracks. Unfortunately, stubbornness has never derailed a freight train.

So, that’s that. What really baffles me about MSN Video Player (yes, beyond its very existence) is that Microsoft’s chosen to roll it out on Flash. That’s Adobe’s Flash. That’s Adobe, the next-door-neighbour with the bigger garden, prettier wife and stranglehold on the internet. Microsoft’s been trying to unseat Flash with Silverlight for the last couple of years, ushering developers towards the platform with big smiles and over-elaborate tech demos. And now, confronted by one of its biggest web rollouts for years, it expresses its confidence in Silverlight by sidling into its rivals garden and groping his wife. (more…)

Getting started with eBooks

Thursday, July 23rd, 2009

If you’re in the market for an eBook reader and are baffled by the dozens of models on offer then hopefully I can help. Having reviewed a good number of the eBook readers on offer in the UK, I’m well placed to help you wade through the morass of marketing terms, claims and sheer nonsense that comes with every launch.

The first thing to note is that the UK eBook market isn’t actually as packed as it first appears. In fact it can be boiled down to the Sony PRS 505, the iRex range and the rest. And when I say “rest” I’m talking about the BeBook, Cool-er, Cybook Gen 3 and the Elonex eBook now on sale through Borders. Don’t be fooled by the slight modifications to their cases; beneath the exterior they’re all essentially the same device.

Basically, manufacturers buy the reference design from US-firm Netronix, tweak the hardware and software, slap their name on the case and sell them on. Currently at the top of this pile of identi-books is the Cool-er which is based on Netronix’s latest spec and so boasts double the RAM of its compatriots, a nicer screen and a faster processor making it noticeably nippier than the rest. If the Cool-er’s lurid colours and dedication to sexing up reading aren’t to your taste, then I suggest you take a gander at the elegant Sony PRS 505 – which sits at the top of our A List.

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Microsoft’s Project Tuva: physics made fun

Thursday, July 16th, 2009

Under the title Project Tuva, Microsoft has posted a series of classic physics lectures by Manhattan Project collaborator Richard Feynman for free on the web, and in the space of an hour they’ve become one of my all time favourite things.

They’re brilliant. Feynman has a lovely delivery that sweeps you along, together with a depth of understanding that allows him to strip a difficult concept down to its simple foundations, without needing to dumb it down. He just knows the right door to open in order to usher you quickly into his world.

Even if you’ve little interest in the topics under discussion, it’s well worth spending a few hours in Feynman’s company for the entertainment value. He’s a genuinely funny man able to express his science with a poet’s turn of phrase.

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Microsoft Office 2010 screenshots

Monday, July 13th, 2009

Microsoft has unveiled the first details of its forthcoming Office 2010 suite. Read our news story to find out what you can expect, and scroll down for a sneak peek at the changes. You can also read our complete preview here. Remember to click the image for the full-size view.

Square ribbon

After the complete visual overhaul of Office 2007, it’s not surprising Microsoft’s playing it a little more conservative with Office 2010. The controversial ribbon remains and has been rolled out across all applications including Outlook, but it’s now blockier – bringing it in line with the design of Windows 7.

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Gaming-gem Daggerfall is now free

Friday, July 10th, 2009

This is slightly off the PC Pro beat but given that a great, big slab of gaming history is involved I decided to stretch my legs. Bethesda (that’s them who made Fallout 3 and Oblivion) have just released the Elder Scrolls II: Daggerfall for free in order to celebrate fifteen years of the series. It’ll happily rattle around in a 150MB corner of your hard drive and needs only hugs to make it happy. You’ll need that gaming-gateway-to-the-past DosBox to get it running – that’s right chums Daggerfall really is that ancient – but if you’ve never gazed upon this gem I suggest you do so now.

You see, Daggerfall wasn’t coded so much as assembled out of dark matter. That 150MB contains a huge landscape filled with thousands of towns, dungeons and happenings. It’s randomly generated meaning that after a few hours you’ll inevitably find yourself wandering down the same section of corridor for the eighth time, but it’s still quite an incredible sight when you first clap eyes on that immense game map.

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Microsoft Office 2010 trailer kills Clippy

Friday, July 10th, 2009

It’s official. Microsoft’s marketing department has relocated to a smoky cafe in Amsterdam and is enjoying the special muffins. The company’s just posted its promo advert for Office 2010 and it’s madder than a hatter in an electric chair.

Filmed by a Michael Bay enthusiast and featuring some gravel-throated voiceover – they’ve turned Office 2010 into a summer action blockbuster. Whatever was cracking in Microsoft’s collective head has now quite obviously snapped to superb effect. Expect explosions, car chases, shouting and the kind of crazy usually reserved for US Michael Jackson fans.

At the heart of this nonsense is the death of Clippy – the rubbish Office assistant who so blighted our lives 10 years back, though our favourite moment arrives at the end of the trailer when the reviewer’s quotes flash up. Bonkers, bonkers, wonderfully bonkers.

Those Internet Explorer 8 ads? They were just the beginning it turns out. Hoorah.

Should I buy an iPhone 3GS?

Wednesday, July 8th, 2009

I’m not normally an indecisive person. For proof of this fact, I offer the following example.

“Sir would you like the chicken or the fish?”

“Fish please.”

You see, no hesitation whatsoever. However as my trusty, old (in fact, so old I don’t know what kind of phone it is – a Sony Ericsson K700i possibly) wanders drunken into obsolescence I have to face the fact that I need a new phone. Like an ageing secretary, it now ignores the majority of my calls, completely ignores text messages and naps at random times. It also has a battery life based entirely on who’s calling. If it’s family, friends or somebody else important then it’ll run for about 12 seconds. If it’s my bank manager, or a mentalist who refuses to believe they’ve got the wrong number then I can count on a solid 30 minutes (extra if they threaten my life with a carrot).

I also need a new MP3 player. It’s finally got to the point were the experience of pushing my finger through the fifteen layers of sweat and grime and Stumanity that coat my old one is too much to bear. It would also be nice if it played videos and stuff.

With all this in mind, the iPhone 3GS arrived in the office the other day and golly it’s brilliant. It’s faster than a leopard being shot from a cannon, sexier than Megan Fox halfway up a ladder, and houses a bunch of genuinely useful features. The compass and maps could very well save my life on a daily basis and the iTunes App store could keep my notoriously short attention span cowed. I also quite like the games. (more…)